I usually don't post on the weekends, (or as often as I should during the week for that matter but that's neither here nor there!) however, today is a big day! Today we are celebrating my Father's birthday! I can't really even put into words how wonderful my Father is. And if he reads this he will get very uncomfortable and may wish I hadn't publicly put into words how wonderful he is. This is a man who doesn't cry, but gets a very "bad headache" when he gets emotional, then gets ticked off at the fact that he has a "headache". These headaches can be brought on by watching Marley and Me (Sad stories about dogs give him really bad "headaches"), conversations about his Father (who incidentally was also one of the most wonderful, kind, authentic and upstanding people to walk this earth...the apple doesn't fall far.) Or any sweet/sad story about children, children at Christmas, dogs and children, ohhh boyyy. Additionally try giving him a compliment. I don't know if it is being Irish, being Catholic, or from being raised in the Bronx, or all of these combined but the man simply cannot take a compliment. This is a trait I simply did not inherit from him, while I bask in the glow of accolades and flattery, my Father becomes downright squeamish. Or, even better, in reply he will simply compliment you! For instance he just lost some weight and is very trim and looks like a college boy, when you tell him how great he looks you get in return, "Well, now you really look great, I'm not just saying that, you look wonderful." Amazing, right?
My Father has an excellent sense of humor and a dry whit. He won't be the person telling loud punch lines in the middle of the party, he is the one who will quietly make an observation that will have you giggling and shaking your head. He also is a tease and likes to play subtle jokes. What astounds me is that after 44 years of marriage he will say something clearly absurd and completely false to my Mother (like that he was in a gang when he was a kid in the Bronx or that he threw out the food she just brought home from the grocery store) and her consistent response is this high pitched, shocked, "Really?!!" No, not really! It's just Daddy being Daddy.
He is one of the most honest and principled people I know, except when chocolate chip cookies are involved. All bets are off when cookies enter the picture. Here is a man that is truthful and scrupulous in all areas of his life, from work to raising kids, however, he WILL eat every last cookie and deny it with a straight face. And never come clean, even when presented with the evidence that yes, he did indeed eat them. When my parents first moved up to Connecticut my friend Missy (MISSY Daddy, NOT MISTY!) and I brought a picnic lunch up with us and some nice gourmet chocolate chip cookies as a housewarming gift. My Mother told me that after we left she was looking for the cookies and my Father told her, "Oh, I think the girls took them back into the city with them when they left." Yes, of course we took the cookies we brought for you as a gift back with us when we left. The cookie monster had struck again.
Now having such a great Father growing up could be a disadvantage later in life. For instance when I got older I was amazed to realize that adults didn't actually know everything about everything. Apparently you can't just walk up to someone and ask them for information about World War 2 and expect a detailed answer, unless that person happened to be my Father. Also, if you are visiting someplace for the first time, you don't just know every detail and fact about that place, as if you were a tour guide, seemingly by osmosis. You actually have to read up about it or hire an actual tour guide. Sheesh! Also, nice vacations, fun family outings and an all around good quality of life (now this wasn't just my Dad's fault, my Mother also made this all look easy as well) they don't just happen! All that business takes work! And it's not easy folks! Boy, did he pull the wool over our eyes when we were young. He made this all look easy and well, being a good Father, provider, loving parent, spouse and giving your children a good upbringing is hard work. Who knew?
Two years ago my Father was diagnosed with prostate cancer. He handled it in the way he handles most challenges in his life, with a level head, a plan, and focus. He was more worried about my Mother and us girls than himself, he wanted to assuage our fears and anxiety. He ate well, exercised and scheduled his surgery. When he awoke from the surgery I must have looked pal and/or freaked out so he asked me, "Are you feeling alright, do you need to sit down, you look pale." What?!! You just had surgery! Are you alright?! That pretty much sums up how my Father lives his life, he is focused, he always has a plan, he thinks of others, he is kind, funny, smart, loving and not only a wonderful Father but an amazing example of how to live life with humility.
Two years ago on his Birthday as we all said grace before dinner, while I was praying I made what my Father would call a typical Mandy comment, as I prayed to God I said, "Dear God thank you for sending my Dad to me, I am so blessed to have him in my life." He started to laugh and said, "Excuse me! God sent you to ME and into MY life!" Either way I am so thankful He did. Happy Birthday Daddy! I will let you off the hook now because you are either squirming in your seat or have developed a REALLY bad headache!
Oh Mandy! You are so amazing! Thank you for writing this! I love you Daddy! and Mandy has you pegged! and I have a headache now too!
Posted by: Clarie | 10/30/2010 at 02:20 PM
Damn, I have a headache and you do look great!
Love, Dady
Posted by: Jim McCorry | 10/30/2010 at 03:42 PM
A gentleman and a scholar!
Posted by: Michelle | 11/01/2010 at 09:56 PM
I finallyy read this post and what a great one. I love the subject! Ditto! Amen to that! I agree, and Mandy you wrote it so beautifully. I love you Mandy and I love you Daddy!
Posted by: Robin | 11/11/2010 at 11:55 AM
Ok, now I just read this and I'm in tears. Your dad is certainly a world class guy. He is dependable and moral and humble and Christian and a great example. He is very funny and smart and warm and generous and reassuring. Thank you for sharing him!
Posted by: jen | 01/06/2011 at 10:52 AM